07

Yes, this is the asshole from the STL Cardinals section writing a concert review.

Let’s be clear here- I know very little about music and even less about Daughtry or Lifehouse or Cavo. In fact, I felt like a sack of assholes last night and if it wasn’t for a previous promise to a good friend that I go to this show, I wouldn’t have thought twice about missing the whole damn thing.

But I went. I Twittered during the whole show. And I lost 6 followers.

Devastating.


I watch American Idol. Incredibly gay, I know. But I can’t help it. I love Simon and his soul-crushing critiques. And to be perfectly honest, I thought Daughtry would be a curiosity along the lines of Taylor Hicks or Ruben Studdard by now- more than welcome at the county fair or corporate charity event… but closer to playing your backyard than a sold-out arena.

I’ll never doubt Simon again.

Chaifetz area was packed full of white people to see this bill. No shit- PACKED. For DAUGHTRY? Fuck, I’m getting old. But there I was- face to face with the face of rock music in 2010.

(Brief side note: Crowd was around 30% MILF or MILF wannabe’s, 35% jailbait, 20% Affliction tee shirt salesmen, 15% American Idol fans and 101% white.)

Cavo opened. I saw absolutely none of this set. The lady next to us when queried about the show said “They’re from St. Louis. I think?” InsideSTL grants the band full permission to use that quote on any promotional materials. Later in the show, Lifehouse mentioned that Cavo had them over to their house for a BBQ. 4 people cheered. These are the things you’re missing at a Daughtry concert.

Lifehouse followed. And here’s where this musically inept douche is a little confused. Lifehouse should be a bigger band then they are. Their set was tight, well-produced and sounded as clear as I think I’ve ever heard a rock-band in a medium sized venue sound. The lead worked the crowd, even performing one of their hit songs way up in the stands. Girls around me were screaming. Almost all the seats were filled.

Why the fuck are they not a player in the alt-rock vertical?

One of those guys needs to get Bombshell McGee on the phone ASAP. Or pay some TMZ paps to follow them. There is absolutely no reason for them to be the opener for Daughtry. None.

Speaking of- Daughtry and his merry band of white guitar players took the much too big stage for a 90 minute set- and the place goes ape.

I was fairly certain I hated Daughtry. Then I knew almost every single song he sung and I realized –FUCK- this guy accounts for 58% of the rock songs that pop music stations like z107.7 or Sirius Hits 1 plays. Unless I turn on my iPod, I’m going to be exposed to Daughtry. We live in a world dominated by DAUGHTRY!

Perhaps it was the Claritin D, but I wondered out loud last night what Daughtry’s reaction would be if two years ago you showed him footage of a sold-out random ass Tuesday night show in St. Louis? Would he be all cool and cocky? I doubt it. I bet he’d shit his pants.

Daughtry scowls the whole time he sings. Even his love ballads are accompanied by pursed lips and furrowed brows. And he likes to bend down real low and come on the mic like he’s licking some beaver. The women seem to enjoy this move.

He covered Phil Collins “In the Air Tonight”. Perhaps the highlight for me personally, but the crowd reacted like he pulled down his pants and shit on stage. Again, I’m getting fucking old.



Perhaps it’s lazy for a reviewer to say that if you go to a Daughtry concert you’re going to get exactly what you expected to get at a Daughtry concert. Personally, I would have hoped he’d have been more like Kid Rock and re-arrange some hits, add in some horns or piano, maybe a backup singer or two for some variety. But no.

It’s like you plugged in an MP3 playlist of Daughtry and got it really, really loudly in your head. And to be honest, it’s not like that’s a bad thing. In fact, it’s what the crowd seemed to want. So bless him for knowing this as a young stage performer and giving it to his fans. Which were way more numerous than I would have ever, ever imagined.

The hits were played. The panties were moist. The Affliction sales reps were satiated for another night.

Just another Tuesday for the biggest rock star in the US not over 50?

Here are some shitty iPhone pics from last night posted on TwitPic:

http://twitpic.com/1dr69d

http://twitpic.com/1dqna6

http://twitpic.com/1dr25d

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Kendra
# Kendra
Monday, May 10, 2010 12:02 AM
Ok, this review was hilarious, and epic. Loved it! Regardless of anyone's opinion of Daugtry, this write up nailed the crowd and show perfectly. Two thumbs up for keeping it sassy :)

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