KMFP posted on March 18, 2013 00:00
It miffs me to no end that we now happily live in a society where tardiness and poor attendance are not only tolerated, but seemingly accepted as the doings of the day.
“Oh, she’s just always late” or “I can’t get out of the house on time”. How man fucking times do you hear that in your work and social life?
I’m one of those “early is on time – on time is late” kinda’ guys, but I’m not saying the whole world should be that way. Just have the common courtesy to arrive somewhere at the designated time, or at least the goddamned balls to drop a call…yes CALL…informing those who are expecting you of your tardiness.
Even if it’s a fucking lie, make an effort. Otherwise it just comes off as you not giving a shit about the time of others, which we all know is exactly the case. “Sorry I’m late.” No you’re not, and furthermore, fuck you.
It’s bad enough that this is perfectly accepted in our social culture, but that’s on us as friends and family members. If you hold up parties or purposely schedule the meal a couple hours after the party time to accommodate these rude assholes who see fit to show up when they feel like it, that’s your problem and yours alone.
Some just accept it and schedule parties, practices and dinner reservations about 45-minutes prior to when they actually want them, theoretically putting invitees who think they’ve arrived late, there at the “real” time they wanted all along.
The rest of us move on without them, dirty looks and all.
Again, that social norm is on all of us, but, in the employment world, there is ZERO reason for this continued tolerance. For the majority, you are hired with the agreement to perform certain tasks and to be at your place of employment for a pre-designated period of time.
Not only are these same “she’s just late” folk consistently strolling in after the proverbial bell, but they are also usually the ones whose idea of quitting time is not the time you start packing it up, but rather the fucking second your car’s ignition is turned on, meaning you headed out the door 5-7 minutes prior to that.
Again, furthering the fact that your time means nothing, yet THEIRS means everything. “I’m off at 4:00”, regardless of the fact that you strolled in 22-minutes late.
Selfish, selfish…MOTHERFUCKING selfish! It’s their world and we just play in it.
“I’m always late”; “I can’t get all the kids up and going”. No, “YOU are a selfish asshole/bitch (usually bitch) who thinks your time means more than the rest of ours. THIS is the reason, period.
Sure, we’ll all run late from time-to-time in our daily life routines. There are accidents, flat tires and sick children, though “we” also tend to allow for such unforeseen things, coincidentally.
These habitual offenders fall completely into the prior category and there is no other excuse.
It’s like they think it’s cute to be “always late” person. Who the fuck would wear that as a badge of honor?
You know what you do when you’re “always late” or “can’t get the kids out of the house”? Huh…anybody…fucking Bueller???
You set your goddamned alarm clock earlier, you often-fat, lazy piece of shit! Skip that episode of “Hillbilly Hand Fishing” or “Teen Mom 6” and set the fucking DVR. I’m assuming you make plenty of “couch time” available each evening to catch up, or that could just be presumptuous of me.
It’s simple math really, if you’re capable of that. Take the amount of minutes that you’re continuously late to your job, and subtract that from the “normal” time you get up, which I’m guessing doesn’t allow for a shower. Add 7-minutes for good measure, and THIS, my challenged friends, is your new wake up time!
Oh – the shower thing? Well, I’m being judgmental – yes – which is one of my favorite qualities in myself. But you see, people of this “ilk” tend to squeeze every possible minute of sleep out of that mattress that they can, meaning they shower before bed, which is acceptable, or whenever they feel like it, which is definitely NOT.
Here’s a surprising fact for you guys…we ALL would love to sleep a little more…that goes along with being an adult, parent and productive member of society. But we have this thing called “work ethic” – look it up.
You’re also instilling some horrible habits in your children, but my guess is that this is the least damaging of what you’re likely doing to their upbringing.
I know, I know, I’m being an asshole. One – this is nothing new, and two – I don’t give 2-shits.
Until we demand punctuality, it will continue to slide. Whenever somebody in the workplace so much as whispers the word “time clock”, the kickback is violent…and laughable. Let me tell you something, if you’re bitching about your boss implementing a time clock, we all know why.
You can scream “trust” or “union” all you fucking want to. But it boils down to you being “that guy” that I just spent 700-words bitching about.
Those that are on time will hit 7-time clocks if you ask them to…because it doesn’t matter.
Find a new rallying cry. If your right to be late or absent is your most important cause, you sir or ma’am, are one sad fucking individual.
I’ll go on being “negative guy”, “cynical guy”, “crude guy” and even “guy who thinks they faked the moon landing”. I WON’T be known as “late guy”.
If the Golden Corral closed at the same time your job started, you’d sure as hell make it there on time…KMFP-out!
LIKE “The KMFP” on Facebook
FOLLOW ME on Twitter @theKMFP
Cardinal baseball coverage: “The Card Room w/KMFP” on LockerDome -
GET STARTED: http://thecardroom.lockerdome.com