posted on September 24, 2010 00:00
What's left to say about this Cardinals team at this point? The dudes laid down sometime in July, it appears, and now the details are starting to seep out.
Flip Lopez got the short haircut from the Cardinals for not being able to bring himself to the park on time... but no, the Birds aren't quitting.
Kyle Lohse got absolutely murdered in Pittsburgh by a group of players that wouldn't be in the major leagues if the worst team in baseball didn't expand their roster to 40 men... but no, the Birds aren't worried about the 20+ million they still owe this guy.
Yadier Molina was shut down for the remainder of the season after a two month stretch in the dog days of summer where he was treated like whore in a gang bang... but no, the Birds have their pulse on the health of all their guys- just ask Brad Penny!
It's just a miserable limp to the finish and I think I speak for all of us who want the damn thing to be over with already. In fact, what the hell are you doing even reading this right now? You don't have anything better to do than concern yourself with these cum farts?
Let's spare the pleasantries and let me submit to you the 2010 season highlights:
You think there are any highlights to 2010? You're fucking nuttier than squirrel crap. If you're one of those guys that thinks chasing statistical milestones is some sort of entertainment-- I have nothing but pity for you. Let me also turn you on to CBS' Friday night line-up, I think you'll enjoy. Those stats (40HR, 20W, etc al) don't mean dick and you know it.
You want the lead?
Cardinals waste 3 of Pujols' 4 most prime, prime years by not sniffing the playoffs.
That's the story. The sheer lunacy of having this fucking monster anchoring a line-up in a piss-poor division and not being able to make it out of it with at least a divisional playoff berth. You think that your kids aren't going to be looking back at these 4 years and wonder just what the fuck was happening in St. Louis those 4 years?
This was it people. THIS WAS FUCKING IT.
After the 2006 Championship, the Cardinals were primed to be a monster in the NL. Pujols and his band of merry beta dogs absolutely raping the NL Pennant every single year. This was the stretch when we saw a guy so damn dominant that it wasn't a question of how'd he get one, but how many times Bill DeWitt would have to rearrange that stupid flag set-up on top of the right field scoreboard.
(Side: Why the fuck did they arrange those poles like that? Fucking so stupid. At least leave space for one more pole to give the impression that you didn't fluke into a WS in 2006. Have some fucking goals, Bill.)
But now we're entering Pujols' option year without a long term deal, short sportscasters are calling for him to be traded and it's entirely possible that these 10 years of brilliance from Pujols will be defined by a fluke run in the October of 2006? One of the worst teams of the decade?
That's some heavy shit, man.
But instead of being a worst case scenario that's pretty much unfathomable... we've reached that point right now.
Fucking pissing away opportunity. Is there anything worse?
@athooks is on Twitter and CardsDiaspora.com and SB Nation STL