And so another season begins.

By the looks of the complete shit show the Cardinals treated ‘The Nation’ to on Thursday, it looks like we’re all in for a real treat. And by treat, I mean a swift kick in the balls around every bend. 

Blown save? Check. Gigantic lapses of infield defense? DOUBLE check. Franchise player grounding into double plays to kill rallies? TRIPLE CHECK! It was like the holy grail of how you don’t want to start the season AND piss off the entire fan base at the same time.


Albert Pujols. Dude came into 2011 with the biggest contract in professional sports hanging over his head. He decides he’s going to big boy the Cardinals and cease negotiations until everyone else can come to the table with their piles of cash. And he starts out this maiden voyage on the sweet ship moneybags with the single worst game I think any of us have seen Pujols play.

Maybe not THE worst. But at least the worst when a national spotlight was shown on him. Pujols is the very rare breed of player that actually surprises you when he DOESN’T come through in the clutch for something like Opening Day or a national ESPN telecast. So when he brags in spring about his hands being ‘too quick’ we took that as a good sign. Looks like that’s Spanish for 3 double plays hit into. 

Infield Defense. The Padres second run came courtesy of a Skip Shumaker dropped ball at second when Yadi had a guy gunned at 2B. The Padres fourth and fifth runs came via something you’d expect to see on YouPorn it was so fucked.

Theriot and Shumaker were big question marks when the season began. And 24 hours in, it looks like those Brendan Ryan dong honkers might have not been totally off-kilter.

Coming back from Spring training, players are usually buttoned up on defense and tend to lapse a bit during the dog days of summer. So when 2 errors lead directly to 3 runs and a L in just 11 innings of trying?


Bullpen. Ryan Franklin made a lot of new internet buddies by being active on Twitter all spring.

Social media is cute and fun when the games don’t count. When you’re a questionable closer to begin with and your yielding 420 foot jimmy jacks with 2 outs and a one run lead? Well, it’s not as cute.

@Franky3131- Less time with the Tweeps. More time on not blowing saves. #STLCards

All this is a complete overreaction. 

No one is going to argue that. Even a little. But when you see the Reds turn a 3 run bottom of the ninth deficit into a 1 run win… you think, hmm maybe they are on to something. The Cardinals on the other hand had the black cloud of death wafting over Busch Stadium thanks to Pujols’ refusal to do any in-season negotiation.

And well, we see how that went.

One day in and the problems are mounting for the St. Louis Cardinals. Another year lost in the vortex of suck that is now St. Louis sports? Or a one game aberration?

If you had to bet money… which would you pick?

@athooks is on the Internet at CardsDiaspora.com & SB Nation


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Big 8 John
# Big 8 John
Friday, April 01, 2011 7:04 AM
I'm waiting for the annual Tim McKernan over-reaction Cardinal column. Where is it? If we win on opening day, we are the best Cardinal team ever. If we lose, we are headed for last place.
Chris Reed
# Chris Reed
Friday, April 01, 2011 10:39 PM
I'm fairly certain Albert would have found a way to hit into a double play with the bases empty yesterday. How do you justify being responsible for eight outs in five at bats?

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