The last time I had sex...

[mbarlow]

use the title of this thread, and then complete the sentence with something that would be accurate.

For example:

The last time I had sex, gas was $1.99 a gallon.
The last time I had sex, nobody knew who Michael Phelps was.

Here is mine:

The last time I had sex, I broke a fingernail.

...and begin.

[effdup]

The last time I had sex I took a half day off.

[Julie]

Last time I had sex, I faked it because he was really trying and I was too tired to correct him.

[StlHoosier]

The last time I had sex, I got bit on the shoulder by a woman from Barcelona, Spain. It left a big bruise.

[JCKennedy]

Last time I had sex, I got punched in the face.

You would think I would learn the first time to keep the thumb out of her butthole. We'll see what happens next time.

[effdup]

Last time I had sex, I got punched in the face.

You would think I would learn the first time to keep the thumb out of her butthole. We'll see what happens next time.

It's just like a button waiting to be pushed.

[Captain_Raoul]

The last time I had sex I was pretending to be sober, but my wife figured it out half way through.

[Belle]

The last time I had sex I had turned him down at first. Then I couldn't sleep and got bored. So then we did it.

[DannyMcGrath]

last time I had sex we came together

[Mrs Ari 2.0]

The last time i had sex, i went into work a couple hours late this morning

[stlouie]

The last time I had sex, I almost got arrested for public indecency

[Pedros Cougar]

The last time I had sex, I got a sore throat and flu like symptoms, but he is just fine. hummm?

[LadyBeercats]

The last time I had sex, it started out solo then he joined in.

[Morning_afterer]

The last time I had sex, it was a nooner.

[Clint]

the last time i had sex there was more dirty talk than i have ever had/heard.. it was teh awesome

[LadyBeercats]

the last time i had sex there was more dirty talk than i have ever had/heard.. it was teh awesome

That's nice you still remember high school sex...






just kidding

[Clint]

That's nice you still remember high school sex...






just kidding

that hurts :p

[kemosabe]

The last time I had sex, I almost got arrested for public indecency

Please explain!

[BigDaddy]

The last time I had sex..... I had to shock our pool the next day....

[LadyBeercats]

Maggie!!!! I Saw That!

[mbarlow]

Maggie!!!! I Saw That!

Hi, Amy...lick me.

[cw113]

I was just here, I didn't see anything.

[Clint]

edit: damn it's gone..

[BigDaddy]

Hi, Amy...lick me.
Now we are talkin!!!

[cw113]

Now that I DID see.

And I definately APPROVE.

[LadyBeercats]

Hi, Amy...lick me.

Are you drinking Tequila again? I think me and RYan are the only ones who saw it.

[BigDaddy]

Are you drinking Tequila again? I think me and RYan are the only ones who saw it.
I saw it....

finally

[mbarlow]

Are you drinking Tequila again? I think me and RYan are the only ones who saw it.

nope...I am just in a giving mood.

six Coronas...tell Ryan to lick me too.

[LadyBeercats]

nope...I am just in a giving mood.

six Coronas...tell Ryan to lick me too.

Well that's nice of you, he's too drunk to lick anything right now. But I'll play.

[Clint]

Well that's nice of you, he's too drunk to lick anything right now. But I'll play.

poor you... t's and p's

[mbarlow]

Well that's nice of you, he's too drunk to lick anything right now. But I'll play.

Ha!

did you guys go to the happy hour thing?

[Morning_afterer]

Maggie!!!! I Saw That!

Dammit, what'd I miss???

[Clint]

mags..

are you flying in for the anniversary party? There was some speculation that you were.. just curious

[cw113]

Dammit, what'd I miss???

We can't tell. Those that saw were swore to secrecy.

[Clint]

Dammit, what'd I miss???

a nice, but brief, avatar change

[LadyBeercats]

Ha!

did you guys go to the happy hour thing?

He did!

Dammit, what'd I miss???

Something sooo good!

[LadyBeercats]

mags..

are you flying in for the anniversary party? There was some speculation that you were.. just curious

Mags, you have to come!! It will be a time you'll never forget if you come!

[mbarlow]

mags..

are you flying in for the anniversary party? There was some speculation that you were.. just curious

Mags, you have to come!! It will be a time you'll never forget if you come!

I declined...I feel bad about it, but I am just not ready for that.

[Clint]

I declined...I feel bad about it, but I am just not ready for that.

awww nuts!

[Morning_afterer]

Something sooo good!

Crap, not again!

[LadyBeercats]

I declined...I feel bad about it, but I am just not ready for that.

:( ok! I will forgive you this time!

[BigDaddy]

Damn Maggy... Like that one too........

[LadyBeercats]

Damn Maggy... Like that one too........

Maggie's always full of surprises!

[Morning_afterer]

Caught that one! Awesome.

[BigDaddy]

Maggy.... You are making my night.. That one was fantastic!

[stewy]

the last time I had sex may have been the lucky shot she was waiting for.

[rutkap]

the last time i had sex was with a co-worker

[bigkirb]

the last time i had sex was with a co-worker


The last time I had sex she squirted all over my chest...Yes it was good, thanks for asking.

[imo6]

The time before the last time I had sex, I was cleaning up puke for an hour. That was fun.*

[stewy]

The time before the last time I had sex, I was cleaning up puke for an hour. That was fun.*

you had sex with Stunner's dog?

[DannyMcGrath]

last time I had sex it was more for baby making purposes than pleasure but sex is like pizza no matter how bad its still good

[Tyler]

you had sex with Stunner's dog?

Spit my soda out

[Julie]

Spit my soda out

The last time you had sex you spit your soda out?

[Tyler]

The last time you had sex you spit your soda out?

uhh.. yea

[Julie]

uhh.. yea

So THAT's what was on TBAs sheets.

[skidog]

The last time I had sex was Wednesday when I attacked Mrs. Skidog as soon as she stepped out of the shower!!!

[thelivingend]

The last time I had sex was Wednesday when I attacked Mrs. Skidog as soon as she stepped out of the shower!!!


that doesn't sound like sex brother. that sounds like a felony.

[Clint]

the last time i had sex was 3 times yesterday.. 7am, 10am and 2pm.. the evening ended with a blowjob at around 7pm..

[Clint]

Holy shit. That is all I have to say. You had a good day.

oh it was great!!

[werneae]

The last time I had sex.....my wife got pregnant.........our son is 2 1/2..............

[Clint]

The last time I had sex.....my wife got pregnant.........our son is 2 1/2..............

ouch.. t's and p's...

[Clint]

Please say weeks old....weeks old would be better, not explicable but better.

didnt think about that option.. automatically assumed it was years.. I hope you're right!!

[800Miles]

the last time we had sex.was anniversary sex on sunday. got kinda freaky. it was cool

[effdup]

the last time I had sex I had a pic of Mags and StlGirla's ass on my ceiling. ......I had sex by myself.

[effdup]

No right clicks were allowed.

ninja please....I got skills....

Sincerely
?

[mbarlow]

The last time I had sex, I disgusted even myself.

[mbarlow]

I didn't realize we got to go again.


Ok...the last time I had sex was with Michael Phelps.








in my mind

you can go again after each time you have sex. I will expect another post from you in about 30 minutes, skankwad.

[effdup]

I didn't realize we got to go again.


Ok...the last time I had sex was with Michael Phelps.








in my mind

Who hasn't, Lord knows I have.

[800Miles]

was. about 45 min ago. two blocks from the house makes lunch breaks awesome!

[Clint]

The last time I had sex, I disgusted even myself.

does this have anything to do with the upcoming column?

[800Miles]

mmmmm, maggie disgusted by herself. sounds like a good read

[Clint]

you slut...

[Clint]

did you at least wake him up before you started?

[Clint]

that's hot..

[mbarlow]

The last time I had sex, StlGirla was prolly having sex too.

[Clint]

are you disgusted this time too?

[Methusalah's Older Brother]

The last time I had sex it was with a co-worker who is way too hot to be with me.

[onthetrail]

The last time I had sex was a week ago. My wife has been gone all week. She'll be home in an hour......

[Julie]

The last time I had sex was the night before this thread was made. :(

[Clint]

i'm hoping i have something to add to this thread after tomorrow night

[Julie]

Damn girl....fix that shit.

Hopefully this week. Won't be this weekend as he has gigs both nights so he'll be tired. And he works throughout the week, so he'll be tired.




Nevermind. Maybe next weekend.

[Clint]

Hopefully this week. Won't be this weekend as he has gigs both nights so he'll be tired. And he works throughout the week, so he'll be tired.




Nevermind. Maybe next weekend.

ouch... t's and p's...

[onthetrail]

Hopefully this week. Won't be this weekend as he has gigs both nights so he'll be tired. And he works throughout the week, so he'll be tired.




Nevermind. Maybe next weekend.

Kids in my generation didn't know what "tired" meant. Just sayin.

[Julie]

Kids in my generation didn't know what "tired" meant. Just sayin.

Oh, it's not just your generation. I just have sex with a lazy bastard.

[onthetrail]

Oh, it's not just your generation. I just have sex with a lazy bastard.

Gotcha. Ts and Ps.

[Clint]

vitamins.. get his ass on some daily vitamins.. i went thru a stent like that and it seriously helped...

[mamaredbird]

Last time I had sex, there were toys involved. Husband's been out of town for a week and a half! :mad:

...and, this is my virgin post in Maggie's Back door!

[mbarlow]

Last time I had sex, there were toys involved. Husband's been out of town for a week and a half! :mad:

oh, my!

and welcome

[Clint]

Last time I had sex, there were toys involved. Husband's been out of town for a week and a half! :mad:

does that qualify??

judges??

[JLS]

does that qualify??

judges??

Ha

Toys=Hairbrushes

[Clint]

so ladies.. is the hand held shower head a good toy?? i see it in porn all the time..

[mamaredbird]

oh, my!

and welcome

Thanks. Quite a place ya got here. (And a week and a half is too damn long. Sucks.)

[mamaredbird]

Ha

Toys=Hairbrushes

Hairbrushes are for emergencies only. They are not buzzy. I prefer toys.

[mamaredbird]

so ladies.. is the hand held shower head a good toy?? i see it in porn all the time..

Never tried that... could be fun, though.

[Clint]

Never tried that... could be fun, though.

hmm... well i want a full report when you do!!

[DannyMcGrath]

th last time I had sex some how it happened to be at half time of the basketball game.... I should follow her to bed..not gonna do it (say it like bush 1)

[Goosie]

Hopefully this week. Won't be this weekend as he has gigs both nights so he'll be tired. And he works throughout the week, so he'll be tired.




Nevermind. Maybe next weekend.

I always thought that was a woman's excuse. I never knew guys were too tired for sex.

[mbarlow]

The last time I had sex, Goosie was prolly playing poker online.

[Goosie]

The last time I had sex, Goosie was prolly playing poker online.

Shouldn't David be working right now? Or did you have sex with BOB?

[souget]

Last time I had sex...my cat came in the room...watched for a sec...then left with this disgusted look on her face....like I was doing it all wrong or something....WTF?

[DannyMcGrath]

Why were you paying attention to the cat?

he had to take his mind of how good it feels some how

[souget]

Excellent question...must focus on one p^ssy at a time...

[BigAlCardsFan]

Hopefully this week. Won't be this weekend as he has gigs both nights so he'll be tired. And he works throughout the week, so he'll be tired.




Nevermind. Maybe next weekend.

I don't get this either.. I read about it (you know, Dear Abby, etc..), but I don't understand it.. I've had sex with my wife when I was up all night the night before on a youth lock-in at church.. I'm NEVER too tired..









Wish I could say the same for my wife, but.....

[JCKennedy]

I figured out why I always cry during sex....It was the mace.

[voetbal024]

i had sex 6 times this weekend and it was tremendous.....for me anyway